Are BOYS and GIRLS born BOYS and GIRLS?
Funny I never thought so. I thought that most of that was nurture. If you put a dress on a boy and treated him like a girl that he would act like one.
Living in this day and age I didn't want my children to feel they had to fit some mould created for society. Now I knew that it could make their live more challenging if they didn't conform but I wanted it to be their choice. At first I bought gender neutral toys and then when we would go to a playgroups I would watch and see what toys they would choose and then nurture that. A funny thing happened, Madison automatically gravitated to dresses and carried around a stuffed cat like a baby and played with girl type toys. She will never wear pants and loves pink. Now with Jack he has a older sister he idolizes and who dresses him in girl clothes and has made him love and learn all the lyrics to all 3 High School Musicals but he was born with a basketball in his hand. He can throw better, understand what to do with toy cars better and loves trains and all while running around in a dress saying 'I a beautiful princess'.
So maybe they are pre-programmed but if they choose to play with gender opposite toys I don't worry. I will follow their lead.
Living in this day and age I didn't want my children to feel they had to fit some mould created for society. Now I knew that it could make their live more challenging if they didn't conform but I wanted it to be their choice. At first I bought gender neutral toys and then when we would go to a playgroups I would watch and see what toys they would choose and then nurture that. A funny thing happened, Madison automatically gravitated to dresses and carried around a stuffed cat like a baby and played with girl type toys. She will never wear pants and loves pink. Now with Jack he has a older sister he idolizes and who dresses him in girl clothes and has made him love and learn all the lyrics to all 3 High School Musicals but he was born with a basketball in his hand. He can throw better, understand what to do with toy cars better and loves trains and all while running around in a dress saying 'I a beautiful princess'.
So maybe they are pre-programmed but if they choose to play with gender opposite toys I don't worry. I will follow their lead.
Exclusively Pumping; Why is it any different than breastfeeding?
This is the question I ask myself as I spend hours a day pumping so that my son can have exactly what he would get from the boob but I don't have to want to die everytime he latches on. Why is it that people don't think that I am doing just as good for my children by doing this than if I breastfed?
Other moms don't tell you the truth about breastfeeding. How extremely painful it can be no matter what you try. I am going to tell you, it can. First I will dispell some myths about breastfeeding:
If you choose to pump and feed here is a great website to help you Mother-2-mother but these are the key points:
Other moms don't tell you the truth about breastfeeding. How extremely painful it can be no matter what you try. I am going to tell you, it can. First I will dispell some myths about breastfeeding:
- Bigger boobs does not mean more milk.
- Bigger boobs makes it harder to get the baby to latch.
- Breastfeeding is not always more convenient.
- You will not be closer to your kids because you did breastfeed.
- Your children will not be healthier because you breastfed.
- You will not loose more weight breastfeeding unless you continue till the baby is more than 6 months old.
- Breastfeeding is not easy!
If you choose to pump and feed here is a great website to help you Mother-2-mother but these are the key points:
- Invest in a good tandem or double ELECTRIC pump. I use Pump-in-Style from Medela but I have also used Ameda's Purely Yours. Both are good. Save yourself from having to wash the horns and bottles every pump by putting them in a Ziploc and then into the fridge, Then once a day disassemble and wash all pieces with HOT soapy water and dry in rack.
- The first 8-12 weeks try to pump as much as you can. I did every 2-3 hours or basically everytime Wyatt woke up to be fed I would feed him and then pump. I am now pumping 4 times a day and my son is 5 months.
- Drink 8-16oz of water while you pump.
- Your machine does not have to be on the fastest or strongest suction to be the most productive. I start 5 min slow and low suction and then go to fastest for 5 min and then move the suction up to medium for the rest of the 25 min.
- Make sure to pump at least one time between 1am and 5am as you make the most milk then.
- Do not pump for less than 15 minutes but always 5 minutes past when your milk stops to stimulate more milk production. I have been there for 45 mins at times.
- Oatmeal, brewer's yeast and flaxseed help to increase breastmilk. Here is a recipe for cookies that have all those ingredients but I use raisins instead of chocolate chips. Lactation Cookies (Tip: Buy brewer's yeast at a health food store as it is very expensive at the grocery store)
- Make yourself a hands free pumping bra. Here is a website for instructions Hands-free pumping bra
- Don't stress if you aren't producing alot at first it will improve. If your milk drops it could be because of stress or your period. I just add one or two more pumps for a few days to increase.
My Body, My Weight
Now I know that I grew up in the 80s and that meant Kraft Dinner and Hot Dogs, canned veggies and McDonalds, then in high school went on crash diets consisting on not eating for long periods of time then gorging on large portions of spagetti or donuts. Well today I know better because now I have spent the better part of my adult life fighting my weight.
In 2000 I joined Weight Watchers because I was over 200lbs and really wanted to get down to a reasonable weight, find a husband and have children. So I succeeded and got down to 154lbs and made lifetime. Then I met my husband and when we got married I had already gain 11lbs and by the time a was pregnant a year later with Madison I was 5lbs heavier.
During my pregnancy I gained 44lbs due to the fact that I was nauseous and depressed and not working because I was so sick and feeling sorry for myself. When Madison was 6 months I rejoined and lost all but 1 pound but then was pregnant a month later and gain another 44lbs. When Jack was one year I joined again and lost all but 3lbs and was pregnant 2 weeks later and gained 34lbs. Now Wyatt is 5 months and I am about 30-35lbs over what I want to be.
In 3 weeks I finish pumping and want to get back to WW and exercising but if anything I can only do WW because it is impossible to exercise with 4, 2 and 5 month old but am going to try. So what am I doing right now, making endless batches of cookies (I love to bake) and eating hidden chocolate bars while my kids nap just to prepare myself for my long long dry spell, lol.
I will blog my progress once I finally get started.
In 2000 I joined Weight Watchers because I was over 200lbs and really wanted to get down to a reasonable weight, find a husband and have children. So I succeeded and got down to 154lbs and made lifetime. Then I met my husband and when we got married I had already gain 11lbs and by the time a was pregnant a year later with Madison I was 5lbs heavier.
During my pregnancy I gained 44lbs due to the fact that I was nauseous and depressed and not working because I was so sick and feeling sorry for myself. When Madison was 6 months I rejoined and lost all but 1 pound but then was pregnant a month later and gain another 44lbs. When Jack was one year I joined again and lost all but 3lbs and was pregnant 2 weeks later and gained 34lbs. Now Wyatt is 5 months and I am about 30-35lbs over what I want to be.
In 3 weeks I finish pumping and want to get back to WW and exercising but if anything I can only do WW because it is impossible to exercise with 4, 2 and 5 month old but am going to try. So what am I doing right now, making endless batches of cookies (I love to bake) and eating hidden chocolate bars while my kids nap just to prepare myself for my long long dry spell, lol.
I will blog my progress once I finally get started.
Sleep its a Health Thing
In my mind sleep is the answer to what ails ya. It is the answer to everything! I have followed this therory for me AND my children but you know what bugs me? People telling me I should be for flexible when it comes to my kids sleeping schedule.
Now I have some really well balanced, well behaved and happy little people. I think there are 3 main things that keep them that way
Healthwise I have seen my children go to bed with cuts or a diaperash and wake up healed. If that is what happens to their skin what do you think happens to their brains and their spirits. Sleep is natures reboot button.
Now I have some really well balanced, well behaved and happy little people. I think there are 3 main things that keep them that way
- SLEEP
- A well balanced and healthy diet.
- Boundaries.
Healthwise I have seen my children go to bed with cuts or a diaperash and wake up healed. If that is what happens to their skin what do you think happens to their brains and their spirits. Sleep is natures reboot button.
Drop-in groups; Speed-dating for moms.
Drop-Ins are general playgroups in your community that have a variety of activies and have a leader to help guide the kids but you are responsible to watch your kids. These are great for kids between 18 months and 5 years. Especially if you have more than one kid its a great option for them. You don't have to go every week and it isn't always the same people.
I am pretty outgoing but I find this much harder to make new friends because its like speed-dating for moms. You meet a mom, size up her kids, her and whether or not you could stand spending 2-3 hours with her and her children. Then if you like ask for her number and then hope you remember to phone her soon enough that she doesn't think you ditched her.
Some groups to look for:
I am pretty outgoing but I find this much harder to make new friends because its like speed-dating for moms. You meet a mom, size up her kids, her and whether or not you could stand spending 2-3 hours with her and her children. Then if you like ask for her number and then hope you remember to phone her soon enough that she doesn't think you ditched her.
Some groups to look for:
- The Family Place
- Strong Start
- Community Centres
Baby Groups to support system.
I love these. I was the first of my friends and my family to have children and living in a new city. I made amazing new friends with children the same age from joining this new moms group through my health department. We started with 16 moms and 17 babies all born between October 2004 and February 2005. The group officially ran for I think 9 weeks but 12 moms kept it going by having what we called 'Coffee Club' every Thursday at 1pm. Each person would hold it at their house and supply coffee and tea and some snacks. We would be there for an hour or 2 and just chat. Sometimes during the summer people would hold a parks but because people were on vacations and husbands were home it slowed down but started again in September. Through that we found people that we had more in common with and broke down into smaller groups and some people went back to work and left us with about 6 moms but then about a year later people started having their second babies and returned for another year. The kids were about 3 and a half before it completely stopped. During those 3 1/2 years I slowly built myself a community of moms that have become my support system but when I had none these people became my support system.
I am still friend with a few of them but I personally found one of my bestest mommy friends in this group and even though we don't spend alot of time together anymore I still feel like I am so lucky to have found her.
I am still friend with a few of them but I personally found one of my bestest mommy friends in this group and even though we don't spend alot of time together anymore I still feel like I am so lucky to have found her.
New or Used. I'll give you the skinny.
Well when Madison was born in 2005 Craigslist was not such a big thing and the Buy & Sell was kind of a pain to deal with so unless you knew people who had babies before you you kind of had to buy new or possibly find a consignment store. But now with Craigslist in most areas and instant access to it online you can get some really great deals.
For example, I bought 30 pieces of 6-9 month summer clothes for Baby Wyatt for $5. They were in great shape because lets face it how long do they really wear the stuff. I have a friend who has a little addiction to buying strollers and she has found some great stuff on Craigslist. I bought the Miracle Blanket for $20 when it was new for $40 and it had been used 3 times.
The other option is Kids Only Swap Meets in your local areas. I have bought toys, a backpack carrier and a toilet all for $30. I usually will only buy toys, toilets etc used that I can clean with bleach and hot water. Clothes I wash with detergent and OxiClean or colour-safe bleach to get any stains I might of missed. The only thing I would be sure to check that it comes from a NON-SMOKING home because it is impossible to get the stink out no matter how much you wash stuff.
Personally if you are planning more than one kid I would buy a stroller new. The following are things I prefer to buy new for safety or hygenic reason;
For example, I bought 30 pieces of 6-9 month summer clothes for Baby Wyatt for $5. They were in great shape because lets face it how long do they really wear the stuff. I have a friend who has a little addiction to buying strollers and she has found some great stuff on Craigslist. I bought the Miracle Blanket for $20 when it was new for $40 and it had been used 3 times.
The other option is Kids Only Swap Meets in your local areas. I have bought toys, a backpack carrier and a toilet all for $30. I usually will only buy toys, toilets etc used that I can clean with bleach and hot water. Clothes I wash with detergent and OxiClean or colour-safe bleach to get any stains I might of missed. The only thing I would be sure to check that it comes from a NON-SMOKING home because it is impossible to get the stink out no matter how much you wash stuff.
Personally if you are planning more than one kid I would buy a stroller new. The following are things I prefer to buy new for safety or hygenic reason;
- breastpump
- crib mattress
- sheets
- mattress pads
- soothers
- bottles
- plastic dishes and cups
- carseats
What to wear when you Babywear
Before I had Madison I got a Snuggly front back wearer and after I had Madison I never wore it. One it hurt my back and 2 what else did I have to do but carry her around all day.
Before I had Jack Jack I was making Maya Baby Slings to make some extra money and because I thought I would have less time to carry him around but after Jack Jack was born I found he got too heavy very quickly to be carrying on only one side of my body and my shoulder and back hurt.
Before I had Baby Wyatt I made some Moby Wraps because I was sure I wouldn't have anytime to be sitting around with him and I LOVE IT! Its soft, it doesn't hurt my back and you can wear it so many different ways depending on the baby's age and weight. Its easy to make even if you can't sew but if you make it use a single knit or fabric with low stretch not no stretch or too much stretch. Here are the instructions to make one:
Whichever carrier you choose start early so that they get used to it. If you wait too long you may not be able to get the baby to like staying in it.
Before I had Jack Jack I was making Maya Baby Slings to make some extra money and because I thought I would have less time to carry him around but after Jack Jack was born I found he got too heavy very quickly to be carrying on only one side of my body and my shoulder and back hurt.
Before I had Baby Wyatt I made some Moby Wraps because I was sure I wouldn't have anytime to be sitting around with him and I LOVE IT! Its soft, it doesn't hurt my back and you can wear it so many different ways depending on the baby's age and weight. Its easy to make even if you can't sew but if you make it use a single knit or fabric with low stretch not no stretch or too much stretch. Here are the instructions to make one:
- Cut a piece of fabric 5 metres long and 20 inches wide. Make sure that the stretch is on the short sides.
- Finish the edges to stop unraveling and over-stretching. You can sew or use a flexible fabric glue to glue the edges down.
- Sew tag in the exact middle of one long side. That will be the top.
Whichever carrier you choose start early so that they get used to it. If you wait too long you may not be able to get the baby to like staying in it.
Things I needed in the first year.
1. 15 flannel receiving blankets per week
2. 30 face clothes
3. Lot of bibs for my spit-upper.
4. My changing table is on a different floor so I found having a playpen with changing table downstairs incredibly helpful. Get a playpen sheet.
5. Diaper genie with Stage 1 refills till 6 months and the baby is on solid food. I go through one every 2 weeks.
6. Swing. You probably won’t need it for long so don’t bother buying an expensive one unless you plan to have 5 kids.
7. Baby monitor with 2 receivers and light alert. So you don't have to listen to the baby cry when your trying to get her to sleep.
8. Vibrating bouncy chair.
9. Crib with sheet, and water proof mattress pad
10. Glider with ottoman.
11. Nursing pillow even when I’m not nursing.
12. Stroller with car seat and base for car. The one I have has a pull-down underbasket, which was brilliant when the baby was sleeping in the stroller.
13. Only one package of Huggies Newborn diapers and then a case of Huggies #1s or 1/2s. I tried every other diaper and Huggies and Kirklands are our choice.
14. Kirkland wipes from Costco. A whole case is under 20 bucks.
15. Chest of drawers or some sort of storage.
16. A baby bath that fits a double sink (if you have one), Gerber lavender baby bath, 2 thick terrycloth towels. Don’t get the cheap, thin ones, you will regret it. It will be like trying to dry your baby with a paper towel, lol
17. I found t-shirts ride up and diaper shirts or rompers, whatever you want to call them, work better at least until there are one.
18. Until they are 3 months, they wear sleepers most of the time. I suggest 7 sleepers, 5 diaper shirts, 1 dress, a toque, 3 pairs of socks, and a hooded sweatshirt jacket to start with. Don’t buy lots of Newborn unless you are planning on having a baby under 7lbs because they grow out of them so quickly. They may not even fit when they are born.
19. Pants and overalls that open in the crotch make for quick diaper changes.
20. Robbeez slippers in 0 to 6 months and 6 to 12 months. They don’t fall off.
21. A travel sleeping bag or bunting with hole for car seat strap. Doesn’t matter what season it is.
22. A baby sleeping bag for the crib.
23. OxyClean powder and a big bucket to soak poopie clothes in because it stains.
24. One box of Ivory Snow laundry detergent and one box of any other detergent that is something “Free” to use after that. Example: Cheer Free, Tide Free, Sunlight Free. Ivory Snow is expensive.
25. A car blanket (thick), 2 fleece blankets (to alternate) and afgan for crib, so the baby doesn’t suffocate when its sleeping.
26. Backpack containing: Changing pad, re-fillable travel baby wipe container with wipes, 2 receiving blankets, 4 diapers, 1 diaper shirt, 1 sleeper, lots of face cloths, bib, socks, a bag for soiled stuff, diaper cream, baby Tylenol, Band-Aids, hand cream, lip balm, water for me, a pen and paper, a sweater/sweatshirt, formula (if needed) and my cell phone and wallet. What is the point of carrying a diaper bag and a purse?
27. If bottlefeeding, wide, slow nipple bottles are good because it is more like the breast and causes less nipple confusion. I would get four 4-6 oz bottles to start with and four 8 oz bottle for later. Madison doesn’t like the Avent bottles. We liked Playtex Ventaire.
28. Breastfed babies need Vitamin D solution (1ml daily) till 1 year for or until they are on at least 16oz a day of formula. You can put it in formula or bottled breastmilk if they won’t take the dropper.
29. A dropper to get rid of snot (yuck! I hate that word) by putting saline or warm salt water up its nose.
30. A mirror for the back window of the car to check on baby when they are facing backwards.
31. The Miracle Blanket for swaddling. Expensive but worth it.
32. Soothese soothers, 2.
33. Exersaucer
34. Jolly Jumper.
35. Bumbo Seat if your kid is getting a flat head.
2. 30 face clothes
3. Lot of bibs for my spit-upper.
4. My changing table is on a different floor so I found having a playpen with changing table downstairs incredibly helpful. Get a playpen sheet.
5. Diaper genie with Stage 1 refills till 6 months and the baby is on solid food. I go through one every 2 weeks.
6. Swing. You probably won’t need it for long so don’t bother buying an expensive one unless you plan to have 5 kids.
7. Baby monitor with 2 receivers and light alert. So you don't have to listen to the baby cry when your trying to get her to sleep.
8. Vibrating bouncy chair.
9. Crib with sheet, and water proof mattress pad
10. Glider with ottoman.
11. Nursing pillow even when I’m not nursing.
12. Stroller with car seat and base for car. The one I have has a pull-down underbasket, which was brilliant when the baby was sleeping in the stroller.
13. Only one package of Huggies Newborn diapers and then a case of Huggies #1s or 1/2s. I tried every other diaper and Huggies and Kirklands are our choice.
14. Kirkland wipes from Costco. A whole case is under 20 bucks.
15. Chest of drawers or some sort of storage.
16. A baby bath that fits a double sink (if you have one), Gerber lavender baby bath, 2 thick terrycloth towels. Don’t get the cheap, thin ones, you will regret it. It will be like trying to dry your baby with a paper towel, lol
17. I found t-shirts ride up and diaper shirts or rompers, whatever you want to call them, work better at least until there are one.
18. Until they are 3 months, they wear sleepers most of the time. I suggest 7 sleepers, 5 diaper shirts, 1 dress, a toque, 3 pairs of socks, and a hooded sweatshirt jacket to start with. Don’t buy lots of Newborn unless you are planning on having a baby under 7lbs because they grow out of them so quickly. They may not even fit when they are born.
19. Pants and overalls that open in the crotch make for quick diaper changes.
20. Robbeez slippers in 0 to 6 months and 6 to 12 months. They don’t fall off.
21. A travel sleeping bag or bunting with hole for car seat strap. Doesn’t matter what season it is.
22. A baby sleeping bag for the crib.
23. OxyClean powder and a big bucket to soak poopie clothes in because it stains.
24. One box of Ivory Snow laundry detergent and one box of any other detergent that is something “Free” to use after that. Example: Cheer Free, Tide Free, Sunlight Free. Ivory Snow is expensive.
25. A car blanket (thick), 2 fleece blankets (to alternate) and afgan for crib, so the baby doesn’t suffocate when its sleeping.
26. Backpack containing: Changing pad, re-fillable travel baby wipe container with wipes, 2 receiving blankets, 4 diapers, 1 diaper shirt, 1 sleeper, lots of face cloths, bib, socks, a bag for soiled stuff, diaper cream, baby Tylenol, Band-Aids, hand cream, lip balm, water for me, a pen and paper, a sweater/sweatshirt, formula (if needed) and my cell phone and wallet. What is the point of carrying a diaper bag and a purse?
27. If bottlefeeding, wide, slow nipple bottles are good because it is more like the breast and causes less nipple confusion. I would get four 4-6 oz bottles to start with and four 8 oz bottle for later. Madison doesn’t like the Avent bottles. We liked Playtex Ventaire.
28. Breastfed babies need Vitamin D solution (1ml daily) till 1 year for or until they are on at least 16oz a day of formula. You can put it in formula or bottled breastmilk if they won’t take the dropper.
29. A dropper to get rid of snot (yuck! I hate that word) by putting saline or warm salt water up its nose.
30. A mirror for the back window of the car to check on baby when they are facing backwards.
31. The Miracle Blanket for swaddling. Expensive but worth it.
32. Soothese soothers, 2.
33. Exersaucer
34. Jolly Jumper.
35. Bumbo Seat if your kid is getting a flat head.
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- CFS Fairy
- A Canadian Stay-at-Home mom of 3 beautiful and awsome golden cupcakes. I have been a mom since 2005. This is the best job in the world but it is sure tough sometimes, don't you think? This is my journey.